Soap Operas and Bon Bons, Of Course!

I read a little "opinion column" article this morning in which the question came from someone wondering, in effect, "What do stay-at-home moms DO all day? And why do they always claim to be so busy? I mean, they just stay. at. home. Right?"

HAAAAhahahahahahahaha

Ok, sorry about that. Now, seriously... does anyone really think that? Am I deluded in my opinion that most people "get" what a tough job taking care of children and a home can be? I'm not quite a stay-at-home mom, but I'm close enough that I feel qualified to answer the above reader's question. I charted one typical day at home with my kids, and now you, my dear readers, will no longer be in the dark about what goes on in the life of a SAHM (if any of you are something different! Ha.). Yes, we actually use that acronym for ourselves.

6:30 - Hubby wakes me and the Snugglebug up. (Wake-up can be anywhere from 5:00 - 6:30 in my house. The only reason we required "the call" this morning was because Snugs had been up at 8:30, 11:30, 2:30, 4:00, 5:00, and 6:00. That was actually one of her better nights.) I changed her diaper (as she kicked and screamed), and nursed her a bit (though she had nursed most of the night...).

7:00 - Had a cup of coffee, spent 10 mins on facebook, while ignoring the crashing noises going on in the kitchen where the kids were playing, then wrote my to-do list for today and tomorrow (We're having a Halloween party this weekend. Otherwise, I wouldn't be so organized.).

7:30 - Made and ate breakfast, fed the Snugs.

8:00 - Cleaned up the kids and the kitchen, replaced all of the dishes and pans the kids had pulled out of their "permission cupboards" (those crashing noises from earlier), wiped down the table and chairs.

8:30 - Built some block towers, broke up a fight over the blocks, played Wall-E games, wiped the Wigglebug's tush, changed the other one's diaper (kicking and screaming - that's just how she rolls), got both kids dressed.

9:00 - Sorted laundry, stopping several times to break up fights, kiss fingers pinched in drawers, pull Snugglebug out of non-allowed areas... finally had to shut the bedroom door in my 10-month-old's face in order to just get the sorting done. Seriously. What would normally take me 30 seconds, took 15 minutes. But then, once I was shut up in my room alone with the laundry, I found myself slowing down to relish the "time to myself." Yes, that's what I just said. I was blissfully alone, sorting my laundry. SO, then we took the laundry down to the basement to start a load. Built a marble run for Wiggles, entertained Snuggles for a few minutes because she suddenly hates her Exersaucer and is not allowed free reign of the basement (where we keep all the choke-able toys).

9:30 - Nursed my little S, got her down for a nap (kicking and screaming), put on a video for W, hopped in the shower. The clouds parted, a beam of light shone upon me, and the angels sang. Or I just had a few quiet minutes while I washed up. Same thing. By the way, I wonder if anyone else has ever been walked in upon by their son during the exact 3 seconds of their 10-minute shower during which they were washing their *ahem*, then startled and stammered as if he had caught them filming porn while Daddy was at work...? And for anyone who may not have kids and is thinking (@#$%^&?????), NO, I am not going to lock the bathroom door while I'm in the shower. I'm not even going to close it. My 3-year-old might push the couch into the kitchen, climb up on the counters, get a chef's knife, and start cutting off appendages that we wouldn't let the hospital staff near when he was born, and I wouldn't be able to hear him!

10:00 - Re-fueled (mango, which I *of course* shared with Wigglebug.), got socks and shoes on both of us, raked leaves in the front yard, while giving W a little science lesson on the fall... oh crap, Snuggles is up early... pulled the exersaucer outside, got her up and into socks and shoes, and finished raking.

11:00 - Played in the leaf pile (no, this is no longer optional once you have kids), then re-raked the pile. Let Snugglebug play in the leaves for her first time ever. <3

11:30 - Helped Wigs make "hot cocoa" (chocolate almond milk warmed in the microwave... lol), nursed Snugs, made Cheater Soup with lots and lots of "help".

12:00 - 8 mins on facebook while the soup cooked, ate lunch with my little loves.

12:45 - Cleaned up the children and the kitchen again, while helping W get his shirt back on, pulling S off of the bookshelves, dancing around the room "screaming" "NO! Don't color me with a giant crayon!" for W's benefit, then finally re-locating the children to "the surprise room" (W's) to play.

1:00 - Read naptime stories, Wigglebug lays down for a rest.

1:15 - Went downstairs to switch laundry (yes, that's the laundry that I started at 9:00)... oh crap, forgot to bring the Exersaucer in from the front yard... pulled that back inside with one hand, Snuggles on my other hip, THEN switched the laundry while she played in it.

1:30 - a little one-on-one play with S - the first chance for this all day, if you hadn't noticed... poor second child.

1:45 - Nursed Snuggie-bear, tried to get her down for a nap (kicking and screaming)...

2:20 - S finally went to sleep, but W never did, so got him up. Started the diapers on their second wash, let Wigs play downstairs alone for a while so I could clean the bathrooms. Three toilets, three sinks, three mirrors, one tub... sigh. I'll hit the shower another day. I'm the only one who uses it anyway.

3:15 - Sat down for a snack with Wigglebug, read him a book, taught him how to draw fireflies (He needs to work on his fine motor control.).

3:55 - Snuggie's up! Set the kids up playing together, hoping to write this post... stopped many times to break up fights, change S's diaper, put a stop to destructive behavior, start some navy beans on a quick soak, clean up messes, nursed the Snugglebug, heard a mysterious bubbling noise... oh crap, I forgot about the beans boiling in the kitchen!!! Saved them just in time. Added more water to return them to a boil, back to bedrooms to put out a figurative fire this time... oh crap, forgot about the #$%^& beans again! Turned off the heat to let them soak. W's crying - kiss boo boo.

5:30 - Hubby calls. He's on his way home! Haaaaaaallelujah! Cleaned up every single toy my children own... and it's 5:49. Time to cook dinner, clean up everything all over again, do jammies, stories, bedtime, more laundry... :)

Broccoli Slaw

I try to have raw lunches as often as possible, for the awesome vitamin and fiber content. This was a good one! I garnished it with carrots for the photo, but trust me, I heaped about twice this amount of slaw right on top of them after the shot, because I eat HUUUUGE servings. I'm breastfeeding! That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. So far it seems that I can eat as much vegan food as I want and still shed the extra weight I've been carrying around for the past 10 years.

2 Tbs red onion, minced

1/3 cup pineapple, chopped

3 - 4 leftover broccoli stems, trimmed and grated

2 stalks celery, grated

1/3 cup dried cranberries

1/4 cup raw sunflower seeds

1/4 cup apple cider vinegar

3 Tbs canola oil

2 Tbs agave nectar or honey

1/2 tsp celery seed

1/2 tsp black pepper

1/2 tsp sea salt

Chop the red onion and pineapple together in a food processor (or not). Change to a grating blade and grate the broccoli stems and celery. Transfer salad to a bowl, then add cranberries and sunflower seeds. Mix vinegar, oil, sweetener, and seasonings in a separate small bowl, pour over salad, and toss to coat. Marinate for 30 minutes before serving.

I thought this was pretty good, and a great way to use broccoli stems after using the florets for dinner, but it could have used more zing. I tried lime juice, but that didn't quite cut it. If anyone has suggestions, I want them!

And a couple of pics of the Snugglebug, because she is cute and was awake when I had my camera fired up for the slaw. :)

Cultivating Confidence

This is an issue that I've been working on since before my kids were born, and I'm so grateful to my boss (and friend) for making me aware of it. How do we inspire our kids to be confident, competent, fulfilled, and successful? Studies consistently show that praising a child's effort, NOT their intelligence is the best way to support their future success. For me, it's been hard to wrap my head around the idea that praising a child's intelligence can be counterproductive. I mean, that's what we're supposed to do for our kids, right? "Honey, you're amazing! You are so smart!" And I find that almost everyone I meet does fall into this trap. It is SO important to focus on the effort your child puts into a task, and the feelings of accomplishment they get from working hard and conquering something that was difficult for them. I'm working on it...

Here's a great article summarizing one of these studies:
http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/

A Quick Summary

I thought a good way to kick this off would be with a quick summary of who I am and what I do. And you need photos. Being a photographer, I refuse to leave you visually un-stimulated. Is there a better word for that?

This is me:

I am a mother, of course, but I'll get to that in a minute. For money, I am a nanny 30 hours per week, 10 of which are daytime, and 20 of which are overnight "hopefully sleeping" shifts. I have cared for the same family for the past 7 years now (WOW!), and their boys are almost as important to me as my own kids. When I first started with them, I worked 90 hours per week! One of their boys has autism, so his sleep is easily disrupted. They hire help for overnights so that he can get the attention he deserves if he wakes up at night, and they can still function as parents and at their jobs during the day!

I am also a photographer, who hopes to someday have the time and energy to pursue a full business. For now, I take friends and family as clients, and their referrals, and save money on portraits of my kids. Ha!

I tend to make non-traditional choices for myself and my family, and probably annoy everyone around me who doesn't understand why I can't just be satisfied with "normal" living. Whatever that is. I'm just a "questioner", and that's not changing anytime soon. Most notably, I've recently gone vegan, and am trying to reduce my son's consumption of animal products, too. (My daughter is too young for that junk, anyway. hehe) My motivations for eating plants instead of animals are different from those of most vegans, I think. While I don't like the way animals are treated, I'm more concerned with the health of the environment, my health, and the health of the people I care about. Without starting a sermon on the subject, the best diet for US, doesn't include eating THEM.

Now, on to my favorite subject ever, in the whole world: my family!

I'm married to my highschool sweetheart. I'm having trouble finding the words to explain how wonderful he is... I guess I'll just leave it at "he touches my heart and soul." He puts up with my crazy ideals, too, and that's really saying something. On top of that, he's given me the two most amazing children that have ever been born. Period.

This is my Wigglebug. I am undecided whether to share their names or not, so I'll stick to nicknames for now. He is 3 1/2, and so full of life! His imagination is astounding, and I can't wait to watch what he does with school. Scratch that. I can wait. My baby is disappearing so fast... He is very sweet and empathetic, outgoing, and energetic! His personality is a lot like mine, in that he is a bit afraid of failure, and seems to set too high a standard for himself, so I do worry about that...

And our sweet little Snugglebug is now 10 months old... She is a challenge! She has been a much fussier baby than her brother was, and if possible, a MUCH worse sleeper, but she is also much more physically affectionate. Her personality is starting to blossom, and what I see so far is determination with a capital D! When she is learning a new skill, she will practice it over and over and over and over and over and over until it's easy for her. I predict that she will grow up to have a fantastic work ethic! Development-wise, she is cruising around the furniture, and starting to let go while standing (though she still falls immediately), crawls up on hands and knees almost all the time instead of army crawling, waves hi/bye, signs "milk", says "Mama," "nom nom," and possibly "Bub Bub." She's not very interested in solid food yet, but is breastfed, so I'm not worried yet. She is eating a little better, slowly, as the weeks go by.

And now, my tiny one is calling/screaming for me, so must run! You can expect lots of my posts to end this way...

Here we go!

I've wanted to do some personal blogging for a while now. I'm not sure what has possessed me with that desire, given the neglected state of my business blog (and my business), but what the hey.

I have found that as I get older, and hopefully wiser, that it's much more difficult to find simple solutions to ANYTHING. Why??? So frustrating. It doesn't help that I'm an over-analyzing, over-planning, wannabe perfectionist. I have a hard time these days figuring out who I am, what I want, and how to make the best choices for myself and my family. It may be that this blog may help me figure some of those things out, and share a bit more of myself with those around me, near and far. I can't promise to blog every day, or every week, or every month... but I will promise to share some thoughts, some photos, and, I hope, some laughs!

I'll be back soon to throw some photos on here, but right now, I've got the Snugglebug sleeping, the Wigglebug watching a movie, and probably 10 free minutes in which I can take a shower. It's the freaking weekend, but yeah, even on Saturday, it's complicated.